beware exploding snakes

I've been meaning to blog this for a while.

Procrastination affords the perfect opportunity!

About a month ago, my roommate Ruth found this very amusing article online. It's been a giant inside joke since.

Heres the just of the article:


A 13-foot Burmese python exploded while trying to digest an alive 6-foot aligator. Both animals died as a result.

Ow.

this probably hurts like hell

What Ruth and I cannot figure out is how the hell the aligator got swallowed alive in the first place. I mean, I can understand the python more. It seemed big enough that it really wouldn't have much of a problem swallowing an aligator.

Regardless though, being swallowed is something that generally takes some time. Perhaps the aligator was napping? Had a long night partying and not only woke up with a nasty hangover but also inside of a giant python? I like to think the python's part was due to peer pressure. Perhaps his buddies got together and dared him. Perhaps it was something like this:

Python: Oh dude, I'm so hungry, I could eat like 10 dogs!

Python Friend: Oh dude, I'm so hungry, I could eat like 20 dogs...and a monkey!

Python: Oh yeah? I'm so hungry I could eat an entire aligator!

Python Friend: Dude, you could totally NOT an entire aligator! In fact, I DARE YOU to eat an entire aligator!

Python: Yeah?

Python Friend: Yeah! In fact, I TRIPLE DOG DARE YOU!

Python: ....uh, yeah? *toungue flickers nervously*

Python Friend: FUCK YEAH! IN FACT, THAT ONE RIGHT THERE! THE SIX FOOT ONE!

Python: Uh, I dunno dude... that looks kinda big...

Python Friend: What are you, some kinda retarded little gardner snake? DO IT! I DARE YOU!

(other pythons hiss encouragingly as python starts)

Group of Python Friends: GO! GO! GO!

*5 hours later*

Python Friend: Well THAT ended badly...

hehehehe. for more on this article, clicky here.

Although, my version was much better than whatever crap ABC News has in that article. Seriously. I dare ABC News to write something better. I dare you. I TRIPLE DOG DARE YOU! DO IT! DO IT!

*ABC News explodes*

Until Later,

Sondra